Positive Thoughts

I am feeling quite positive this morning, I did well yesterday, I did have a burger for tea out with my friend, but I had a jacket potato with it instead of chips and just a diet coke. So all in all it wasnt that bad a day yesterday. Not bad, but couldve been better.
Today I am going to try and eat less, and im going to the gym later after work so that will work a few calories off.

If I had a pound for everytime I thought about my weight, jeez I would be so rich. It is on my mind constantly. Sometimes I think im not so bad, I certainly dont feel obese, and I think there are lots of people out there who are much much bigger then me. Then other times I catch sight of myself in a shop window or something and think god is that really me. When did I become so disgusting and fat. Im quite short too so its really noticeable that im overweight. I do have a boyfriend, im not totally unloveable... and he is just the best he loves me for me. But he has said he would like me to lose weight because he knows I would feel so much better about myself, and myself confidence would rocket. I know hes right.
I wish I could just do it and not faff about so much, I mean for goodness sake I choose what I put in my mouth, you'd think it was so easy. But its not. Not for me anyway. I have considered hypnotherapy, but aside from my doubts over whether it would work or not, I cant really afford it. So I am left with having to use my willpower... of which I am lacking.

Its pathetic isnt it, totally pathetic.
My sisters weight fluctuates, she puts on weight quite easily, but then she finds it really easy to lose it again. She lost quite a lot of weight recently in quite a short time, I asked her how on earth she managed it, and she said she just cut out all the crap. That was it. When she puts her mind to it she gets in the zone and just does it. I admire her for that, making a choice and sticking to it.

This post started off quite positive didnt it, and the more I talked about my attempt at weight loss the more negative it became. That sums up my struggle in a nutshell really. Positive intentions that never amount to much.